OK… cue the music.

Boys and girls, it’s that time of year again… time for Missouri to do its yearly helmet law dance. You remember that dance, right?

OK, I’ll explain.

The Missouri Legislature begins its 2007 session on Wednesday, Jan. 3. Soon after, a representative to the Missouri House and a Senator (or, usually one in each chamber) will introduce legislation to outlaw our state’s mandatory motorcycle helmet law. Many bikers will celebrate.

Of course, this law doesn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of actually passing.

The proposal will die in committee or fail to come to a vote or just disappear altogether. Sometimes, enough amendments attached so as to make it sufficiently repugnant that nobody would touch it with a 10-foot pole. Or, this might be one of those years where motorcycle helmet law repeal does make it through both the House and Senate – and is promptly vetoed by the governor.

Face facts, Missouri isn’t going to repeal its mandatory helmet law anytime soon. But by flirting with its passage year after year, it’s our elected officials’ way of stroking bikers, making us think that they really care about our issues, but not really doing anything. Legislatures are great thing. Everyone can take credit and, on flip side, nobody gets blamed.

Now, I always wear a helmet when I ride in Missouri – and probably would continue to do so even if the helmet law was repealed. I just don’t like government telling me that I have to wear one. I’m funny like that. For instance, I do believe that seatbelt usage saves lives, but I just don’t want anyone telling me I need to wear one.

I suspect a lot of bikers share the same outlook.

The ironic part about any helmet laws is that states seem embarrassed by them. Think about it. If you enter the state of Missouri on just about any highway, you’ll likely see a billboard that reminds you of Missouri mandatory seat belt law. Usually, it says, “Buckle up. It’s the law” or something to that affect. But, have you ever seen a billboard that shows a helmet and says “Strap it on. It’s mandatory in Missouri. Have a nice day”?

There are no such signs.

Funny how you can’t swing a dead cat on a paved highway in any state without seeing a speed limit sign yet you need to buy a bikers’ atlas or consult Internet sites to find out if you need to wear a helmet.

Maybe this session will be different.

Maybe the legislature will come up with a new dance instead of the same ol’ turkey trot.

Maybe, but I doubt it.

P.S. Write back, tell me what you think about helmet laws. Are they a good thing? Do you ride with your helmet off in states like Oklahoma and Arkansas where they’re not required? Reply back and I’ll post your responses – whether you agree with me or not.