I grew up with a fairly eccentric group of childhood friends. There was “Mooch,” who would eat anything. “Zero” was banned from most grocery stores because he’d steal anything at any time. “Cobs” was a big ole strong farm boy who could toss a square hay bale about 20 yards.

Then there was “Jimmy,” who could flip the skin of his eyelids inside out and pretend that he was Chinese. It was the weirdest thing to see. He did indeed look Asian, especially when he flipped the eyelids and recited off-color sayings by Confucius.

My favorite was: “Confucius say, man who pass gas in church must sit in own pew.”

Fortunately, Jimmy didn’t grow up to be a diplomat or an Olympic athlete. But I thought about him last week when the Spanish men’s Olympic basketball team apologized after posing for a picture where they all pulled the skin back above their eyes to make them look Chinese.

The photo ran in an advertisement for a Spanish courier company and drew sharp criticism from the media and International Olympic Committee. The Spaniards apologized, blamed the sponsor by saying the company insisted upon the picture, and basically were let off the hook.

I’m fine with that.

I happen to think a simple explanation, an acknowledgement that the photo was insensitive and stupid and an apology is generally enough. Everybody makes mistakes and uses bad judgment. Say you’re sorry and move on.

But however much I’m relieved that this won’t grow into an international incident, I also know that reaction would be much different if the American team had posed for that photo.

It’s not likely that Team USA coach Mike Krzyzewski would have allowed his team to pose for that picture in the first place. But, let’s say Kobe Bryant, LeBron James and Carmelo Anthony were goofing around, pulling the skin back above their eyes to look Chinese, and some clown with a cell phone took their picture.

The outcry against the United States would be immediate and worldwide.

Once again, all U.S. citizens, not just the players, would be branded “ugly Americans.” It would give our enemies yet another reason to hate us and our allies would be embarrassed.

Even some people in this country would whine about how this country is filled with ogres and louts. Those who think themselves more “enlightened” than the rest of us lugs would demand that our leaders issue a formal apology. Sean Penn and Susan Sarandon would board the next flight to Beijing to show the Chinese people that they feel Asia’s pain.

It kills me how when a European does something stupid and insensitive, it’s just a prank. They apologize and are easily forgiven. But when an American does the same thing, it’s because we’re stupid and evil.

So, it seems we apologize ...

And apologize.

And apologize.

And we’re still thought of as stupid and evil.

Ah, well. We dodged a bullet here. By all accounts, the American players behaved themselves during their photo sessions and we don’t have to say we’re sorry.

At least not yet.

Steve Booher’s column runs on Mondays.